Thursday, December 11, 2008

Raw Food Diet, Day 318- Frightening Fuitables

Mangos are one heck of a scary fruit. Evil, I tell you. Pure evil.Every morning my dad makes himself a fruity protein shake for breakfast. (He doesn't eat raw meat, can you BELIEVE THAT??!) Now, I can get behind the protein part of that thick beverage but the fruit is just a no-go for yours truly. And that's because it's scary as heck. I stand politely at my father's feet, watching his every move in the morning as he scoops out some protein powder, pours in some water and adds a tasty banana. But when the freezer door opens and that bag of frozen mango chunks comes out I am SO outta there! I make a swizzly-fast b-line for the office and safety of my arm chair and blankies. Mangos are evil!

How are they evil, you ask? They make LOUD noises. I don't like loud noises. They take control over my dad's arm, which is normally used for good - like belly rubs and sock tugs, and they make him --SMASH!!-- the bag of mango bits on the counter. BANG! Dad says they get frozen together and need to be broken apart. I say that the devil lives in that bag and he's trying to take control of my normally peaceful pop. Naughty boys, those mangos. Bad!

Don't invite the wild mango into your home. Don't do it!
Stanislaw

***
Big Pupi is NOT pleased.
WHAT THE $@*& ??????
Mad as poobles,
Big Pupi

19 comments:

Beckett said...

Oh, Big Pupi, I am so sorry!

Beckett

FleasGang said...

Oh no! What's next. Leg warmers?! They do kinda make you look "sporty" though. And Stani, don't hate the Mango. Hate the game.

Shelly & Tommy

Niamh said...

I can see why you are not pleased Big Pupi. That sweatshirt and those booties cover up all your Cocker Spanielness.

And Stanislaw, don't let the Relentlessly Huge Mango Man hear you say anything bad about mangoes. He might sit on you and he is about 10 X your size.

Your friend,
Niamh

Mack said...

Oooh I would be afraid of ANY fruit that has horns and a big 666 on it!

Coco said...

Stan! you dont like fruit? I LOVE eating fruit, in my refrigerator, it is the frozen vegetables that are the devil and make my mommy slam then on the counter.

Pupi! your spaniel fro is WAY too cute! you dont look happy though..

tail wiggles

coco

chasingsquirrelswithrusty said...

Big Pupi does NOT look pleased. Not pleased AT all!

Rusty

chasingsquirrelswithrusty said...

Pee-Ess that mango thing sounds scary!! I hope none of them ever come here!

Thanks for the nice holiday poem! I love it. You two look....great... in your antlers!

Barklove,
Rusty

tad said...

Big Pupi! I'm sorry, but all I notice in that picture is your wicked, WICKED cool mohawk!!!

My girl got me booties a while back.... I should re-post that video for you; it shows you how to get them off quickly.

Maggie and Mitch said...

OMG, our mom ADORES mangos, Stan! Give them another chance! They really are quite yummy!
Poor Big Pupi! The look on his face says it all!

Love ya lots
Maggie and Mitch

Scottie the 'cutie' said...

Mangoes are actually quite yummy, Stan! We get mangoes a lot here in Malaysia and Mom has always given me some...*licks lips* Granted, they're not frozen like the ones in your fridge...we get them fresh from the market. Maybe you should try some fresh ones to see how it tastes like...*wink*

Sorry to see Big Pupi so upset about the clothing! But it's just for the winter (hopefully!)...right?

Scottie

The Animal Doctor said...

oh, what in heaven's name????!

Big Pupi, I total sympathize with you, you wont't catch me dead in that pair of socks???

but its christmas. im sure you will forgive your parents for now, won't you?

Stan, those mangoes look pretty scary to me, i could bark at them!

your pal,
Trudis :)

Lorenza said...

Hi, Stanislaw!
Like Scottie, here we eat fresh mangos! and they are delicious!
Big Pupi does not look very happy! But sure his paws are warm!
Kisses and hugs
Lorenza

Joe Stains said...

clearly the mangos make your people mental and they do stuff like that to big pupi! :(

Biggie-Z said...

Oh, dude, that is SO NOT COOL. I'm sorry your humans are being so awful to you. But you do look very handsome and stylin'. I bet the lady dogs love youm though. You are secure enough in your masculinity to be stylish and sporty. And you'll be warmer for your weebles!

Biggie-Z said...

P.S. Your Daddy put Mango in the freezer and beat on him?? That's terrible!

Does Mango Momma know??

We have to save him!

Petra said...

OMDog I will NEVER let a mango into my house.

You are really decked out in that attire, Big Pupi! I hardly recognized you.

Alex said...

Wow, just found this blog via the WNY Raw group on yahoo. I'm thinking of starting my 1 year old flat-coated retriever on a raw diet. Can't wait to read more! I love it!

Canine Aficionado said...

Were you a bad boy? Why, oh why???
Your pal,

Louis

Dennis the Vizsla said...

hello stanislaw its dennis the vizsla dog hay this is verry importent nooz abowt the mangoez becuz this fall dada planted a mango tree on the hill in the bak yard fortchoonatly the tree is owtside the fense so the mangoez will hav trouble gitting into the yard eksept i think dada wuz planning to go owt and pik them and bring them in himself but then we had an unekspekted frost and i think the mango tree has died so i gess i dodjd a bullit their ha ha ok bye