Friday, June 27, 2008
Thursday, June 26, 2008
Wednesday, June 25, 2008
By late yesterday afternoon, I had come to truly enjoy my masculine lake stench that had been brewing on my body since my trip to Beastville. The sofa cover, my crate blankies, and the chair in the office had all taken on the gentlest breeze of the scent, and I was eyeing the human crate for my next stink-making move. Mom came over to me and unbuckled my collar, which I originally thought was to expose more fur and aid me in my stinkifying of the household, but NO. I had been terribly and cruelly duped into trusting that evil human. She appeared with venison jerky and had me follow her into the bathroom. I thought she was going to ask me to add my smell to her towels! But NO!
And she bathed Big Pupi too.
Now I smell as fresh as a flower and I couldn't be more disgusted at myself. And to add insult to injury, she took my fur AGAIN - only this time she took so much that I can no longer be considered a true beast. My mud-catching leg fur had been reduced to such an extent that it leaves nothing to the imagination. I am one skinny, lanky boy and now the world knows!
Tuesday, June 24, 2008
Friday, June 20, 2008
Wednesday, June 18, 2008
After the snack, mom went to work in the office and Pupi and I passed out for... I don't know how long. I curled up on the carpet and snoozled, dreaming of frozen feasts and medium speed hunts until there was a KNOCK KNOCK KNOCK on the door. !!! I sprung from the floor like an electric spark, making all the noise I could so that mom would realize that there were THINGS that were HAPPENING right on the other side of our front door! !!! What joy! What excitement! And just when I thought that it doesn't get any better than a knock at the door...
...mom pulled in 2 big boxes filled with our feasting supplies! !!! There was mutton, beef, turkey everywhere! Blocks of chicken necks defrosting in the sink! Packages of bully sticks and. WAIT. WHAT DID I JUST SMELL???
No way!! TRIPE!!! That's my all-time favorite! As soon as mom pulled that out of the box, Big Pupi and I started fighting and we had to be put in Time Out until we calmed ourselves. Are you kidding mom? Why aren't you this pumped about tripe?! Big Pupi the brown-noser kept peeking over the counter and asking mom if she needed help cleaning up any scraps. He's such a bum-head sometimes.In a whirl mom weighed and packaged months worth of feasts and before we knew it our meat locker was jam packed and all we could smell was bleach (which is a smell I happen to like, much to my humans' disbelief). For dinner I feasted on old ground beef heart but tomorrow I saw a package of ground duck make its way into the fridge. Sweetness. I'm almost positive now that when I explode out of my crate tomorrow morning, it will be the best day of my life.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
What's goin' on fellow doggers? This is Stanislaw, comin' at ya! I'm back and I'm feasting better than ever. Whatever was making me sick has passed, and I FINALLY got a normal breakfast of chicken necks and yogurt. Plus, since I've lost a little bit of weight from my tummy virus from last week and then this yucky bug from this weekend, my humans have been sneaking me treats like crazy!! For the first time ever I tasted PEANUT BUTTER!!! It was melt in my beastly mouth deliciousness and I continued to lick my bowl for 20 minutes after I had eaten all of the peanutty tastiness. My mom took a page out of Mack and Paris's book and mixed up some plain yogurt with some peanut butter and froze it in cups yesterday for my feasting delight this afternoon. I also got a bully stick late yesterday and have my dewclaws crossed that there's another one with my name on it today.
Monday, June 16, 2008
Saturday, June 14, 2008
Friday, June 13, 2008
Our buddy Fenway turned us on to the Fun Ball, and we had to give it a whirl. Despite my iron-clad cocker jaws that have chewed through all rubbery toys in the past (even those made for big dogs!) I am yet to make a dent in the Fun Ball, and it's not because I didn't try. Mom put a jerky treat in there, and boy, did I gnaw and nibble.
Thursday, June 12, 2008
Wednesday, June 11, 2008
Tuesday, June 10, 2008
Monday, June 9, 2008
In the end, I wonder why humans need this Emergency Broadcast System. And I wonder why they rely so much on silly radar devices when they are so fortunate to have us canines in their homes. Everyone knows that us critters come with masterful weather-hunting abilities already in our brains! Just keep an eye on us and we'll tell you what to do. I wonder what happened to people that they lost this 6th sense. Someone should bring it up with their breeder.
Saturday, June 7, 2008
Friday, June 6, 2008
Hi folks! I've been walking around with my head held high the past 24 hours because the world has discovered my ridiculous good-lookingness. You see, Pupi and I went to the bark park yesterday for a good romp with our buddy Hunter. The combination of the freshly muddied dog run and our au de toilette that we got at camp inspired mom to give us a good scrub down and then attack us all over with the buzzy thing. She was surprised at what she found under piles of my thick cocker 'do -- a day-glo shiny boy. I have such a sheen to me I'm almost iridescent, and this gets me lots and lots of attention from strange humans that want to pet the sparkle pup. Awesome! It's only been a day since I've been groomed, but people are already asking who my breeder was, what I'm fed, and if I'm a show dog. A show dog?! I've decided that I'll make the push for rescue and shelter pups out there, and inquiring humans always drop their jaw when they hear that someone threw me away once and that I, too, was a shelter boy. My humans always make a point to let them know that I was not this pretty when they first took me home, but some quality nutrition and a little TLC can turn a sickly dog around. And when they ask what I'm fed... well... I eat raw meat, of course!
I was one very well-behaved boy and I restrained myself from marking any territory and I even managed to avoid doing one of my excitable poobles that always seem to sneak out when I'm having too much fun. That was just Big Pupi representing Red Sox Nation for all you Forgotten Fans out there. To baseball dog fans and to dogs that are ball fans alike...