Raw Food Diet, Day 474- It Lives!! (and other tall tales)

Hey folks! I think that I may owe you a story...

Mom, Big Pupi and I were out for a good, hard fast-hunt the other day and boy-o-boy were we feeling beastly and strong. I was doing my usual zig-zag running and Big Pupi was being all Good Boy and stuff and concentrating on where he was going. We were weaving our way through the big city, dodging humans and wrapping up a 4-mile run when all of a sudden Big Pupi whipped around mom and almost took her down by wrapping the leash around her legs. That nerdy Good Boy never does stuff like that! That's my job!

Well, mom stopped to catch her balance and untangle the 3 of us, when all of a sudden a lady human started to scream. Did Pupi snatch food from her hand? Is she scared of dogs? Did Pupi lunge and BITE??!! - Mom thought, too terrified to turn to look. How UNLIKE Big Pupi!

No sooner did she get her bearing than Big Pupi started to shriek and scream, pull on the leash and act all crazy-like. I just couldn't resist, and zooming around mom in the opposite direction I whipped around and joined in on the hootin' and hollerin'. So there we were, a lady and two dogs screaming bloody murder, and mom teetering on the edge of balance, on the verge of loosing and battle and tasting cement.

Pupi and I continued to pull and scream. The hollering lady human did her best and was soon joined by another female biped. We were a spectacle! Mom was freaked! Mom finally got the guts to turn around and look to see what Big Pupi had done, when out of the corner of her eye she saw a...

BEAVER??!

In downtown Chicago?? This massive brown thing lumbered up the curb and waddled its way across the sidewalk through a fence on the other side. Now there was a chorus of screaming humans along with the two vocal canines. What the... but no. This fuzzy, fat brown thing wasn't a beaver. It was a 15 lb...
MR. RATBUTT LIVES!!! And he's apparently been eating well. On this particular day he was making his way towards an alleyway filled with dumpsters were the prime rat feasting takes place. I wonder if he has a date tonight! Oh I was just SOOO happy to see the ol' guy. He's one major stud of a ratbutt.

Big Pupi and I wanted to chase him down, so that we may sit with him a while and enjoy some pleasant conversation. But, of course, loser-mom said NO WAY!! and she dragged us home, still screaming. I was mad as poobles and made angry faces like this:
On another day, during a morning pooble walk, I saw what I'm sure is one of Mr. Ratbutt's kids racing about town, and Big Pupi and I found a hole in a building that I'm certain is his home. It's right behind a dumpster, so I guess he kind of has a on-suite kitchen. Those rats know how to LIVE!! Pupi and I always try to get a close sniff of his den, but our folks never seem to allow it. I don't know what they have against city rats. They're cool guys that KNOW how to FEAST!! I'm sure they could teach me a thing or two about scavenging. I NEED to LEARN!

________

Away from the awesome rats now and into Nerdy News - Big Pupi FINALLY got his official therapy dog gear. He feels quite noble and proud to wear it.
It has a pocket that holds his fancy badge...
...and a badge that, well... IS a fancy badge.
Mom had to make some adjustments, like cutting the extra straps and gluing the badge holder back on. (She said it's made like a piece of pooble but cost a lot of cheese money. Mom was NOT pleased.) But Big Pupi sure looks dashing in his new gear and he can't wait to take it for a test drive in a few days. He wore that silly girl-scout vest with a HUGE smile on his face:
And just so you don't forget what a handsome, beastly, lip-curling profile SHOULD look like, here's a photo of yours truly:
We have a question for all you crazy canines~

The day after some good, hard exercise, Big Pupi turns into a 6-month old puppy. He bounces, he thrashes, he wiggles and wrastles. He regresses SO much, that strange humans think this (almost) 6-year old greying boy is a baby springer spaniel. He still has his manners (that dork!), but his silly playfulness goes up about 1,000%. Do any of you do this? It's so wacky!

My brother is a wierd-o,
Stanislaw

P.S. - Check out our new shop on Etsy, Tasty Threads! It just went up yesterday. Mom's been working her fingers to the bone - each piece takes DAYS... and she could have been spending that time with me! What is this world coming to?