Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Raw Food Diet, Day 4- I Hate My Mommy

So I'm sure you've heard that I am going through a little detox as a result of my body adjusting to my new BARF diet. I did a few kitchen diarrheas yesterday and also some puking. In fact, I did one particular projectile vomit that grazed my dad in the leg.

So then my mommy comes up with this brilliant idea that it would be good for me to fast in order to let this sickness work its way through my system. Maybe she didn't hear that the BARF diet is about feasting, not fasting. Long story short, I got no dinner last night and I am not speaking to my mommy. I woke up this morning starving and ready to put myself up for adoption. I thought that I would never feast again. It reminded me of the days when I lived on the streets and all I would eat in a week was a banana peel, three frogs, and a Mexican food takeout container.

Much to my relief, I was put in my feasting cage with my dish towel snood on this morning and given a large helping of raw chicken wings. I then did a nice poo outside, so I guess I am feeling better. I'm glad this fasting thing is apparently over. My brother's poo was also good this morning after the long fast, but then he dropped a soft one in the kitchen a few hours later. I was like "come on, man, clean up your act or we are going to have to fast again!" So I am back in action on my raw meat diet after a little starvation scare. My brother has some advice on this whole fasting debacle, but I recommend you bite your humans if they think of following it, even though my stomach does feel better.

No longer hungry,

a hungry word from brother:

If your tummy is not improving and you are still suffering from upsets, fasting may not be a bad idea. Well, if you ask me it's a terrible thing, but I guess the rationale behind it is okay. The thought is that 12-24 hours without food will give your system the chance to settle down, empty itself of what it needs to get rid of, and heal. You should take it easy during your time spent feastlessness, and there should always be fresh, clean water out for you. Your insides should be able to recuperate rather quickly when given the chance, and sometimes they just can't do that if they're constantly being bombarded by irritating foods. Another thing to try would be some slippery elm pills or powder as it coats the intestines with a mucousy layer that helps to protect and soothe. It can even be boiled in some water until it gets thick, and once cooled a little bit of chicken broth or honey can be added to entice you into eating it. But, on your fasting day, that might look quite tasty without the extras. That mix can also be put in with your food, or your human can just add the herb as-is.

1 comment:

Emily said...

ROFL!!!! Your blog is hilarious! =D I put a link to your blog in the sidebar of my blog, so expect more readers! =)