Friday, July 25, 2008

Raw Food Diet, Day 179- R-E-S-P-E-C-T

My mom was appalled yesterday when she found Big Pupi and me going to town on her little Madeline doll.  My mom is called Madeline, and so people always give her toys that share her name.  But she doesn't chew them!  Instead, she keeps them packed away and in drawers, instead of in my mouth where they belong.  Well, yesterday there was some cleaning going on, and one particular doll stuffy escaped the drawer and wound up with its rightful owners.
This wee stuffy has all these delightfully floppy legs and arms, spit-absorbing yarn hair and a little bow that's just begging to be removed and consumed.  Big Pupi did his usual, gentle, stuffy nibble with his front teeth, but I made sure to give her a good thrashing.
Pupi and I worked diligently on this doll, and when mom came out to check on us she found our new toy buried in the sofa next to a very important part of her dainty little outfit.  Stuffies just don't get any privacy around here!
Well, mom just couldn't believe the violation that had ensued.  Do we have no respect for our stuffies?  Especially ones named after mom?  I mean, who would do such a thing and steal unmentionables from a doll??  Pupi and I had stripped our Madeline stuffy of her dignity, and then buried her face-down in the sofa cushions.  Cruel.  Just cruel.  I have to admit that those stuffy knickers were terribly fun to toss about and thrash.  I also made the discovery that I'd look good in a pair of my own, but only if worn as a teeny beret:
In the end the undies found their place in the trash - something about them looking too tasty for a pair of naughty boys who like to feast on stuffy bits.  It didn't make the doll any less appealing though, and we took turns carrying her around the apartment and introducing her to her new home - our jaws.  
I really think she likes it here!  She hasn't stopped smiling yet!

Stuffies.  Sweet.
Stanislaw

13 comments:

Beckett said...

Play nice, guys. Madeline already has one scar on her belly, you know.

Beckett's mom

Petra said...

Ohhhhhhhhhh, how I wish I could have been there when you were playing with Madeline!

Mack said...

A Panty Hat! Cool


-Mack

Agatha and Archie said...

Oh boy,Archie is in HYSTERICS over this one!! Especially the panties on your head!! He is ROLLING on the ground!!!!! Oh dear when he gets like tis it takes a long time toget him to stop laughing!!! Thankyou soooo much fo rthe award!! We are SOOOOOOO behind in all of our reading(PL2 had been wroking alot and we haven't had any access!!!) wE WILL POST IT SOON!! tHANKYOU SOO MUCH!! lOVE AND KISSES a+a

Molly the Airedale said...

Oh no! Poor Madeline! hahaha
You're right - she can't be too upset - she's still smiling away!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Fenway said...

Um, Pupi...were you really trying to eat your mom?

Fenway said...

Stan--

Wear your prong proudly. And remember, it opens the lines of communication with your mom. It'll help you understand gait and keep you focused on walking like a Good Boy instead for forging ahead like a chicken with it's head cut off.

Trust me. Of this I know.

Also, tell your mom to work on getting you to look at her every time she says "Look". When you do it, she should click and reward you so that you get the connection. This will also train you to focus on her. In the beginning, start practicing this at home, where there are fewer distractions. Then move on outdoors. She should carry little tasties to reward you when you glance at her if she says "Look!"

Stan...this is really simple. You need to understand that your humans are way more important than squirrels and other dogs. You'll get it as long as there are tasties involved.

Email me if you need further instructions and ideas. Again, trust me. I've been through all of this and I'm still a work in progress.

Remember: the prong is KEY. Wear it proudly.

Niamh said...

Stanislaw,

You guys did an amazing job just removing Madeline's panties. If I found her I probably would have ripped her little legs off!

Your friend,
Niamh

River said...

Stanislaw, thanks for visiting my blog! My mom has briefly thought about raw diet but it would be hideously expensive with all of us. When there are fewer of us she will try--meanwhile she'll read about your experiences.

Me, I go for the eyes then the head. That was a delicate operation--removing just the doll panties!

love & wags,
River

Opy - the Original GruffPuppy said...

happy barkday stanislaw - have a wonderful day buddy :)

love

opy

Mack said...

Happy Birthday Stani!!

Mack, Paris, Lilly & Mom

Princess Patches said...

Happy, happy Barkday, Stanislaw! We hope you get lots of extra treats and snuggles today!

Aire-hugs,
Poppy, Penny & Patches

Scottie the 'Cutie' said...

Hahaha...that was a cool and funny story there,Stan! Mom couldn't stop laughing when she saw you and your undie beret! =P I love to chew on human stuffies too, but Mom soon found that out and kept it away...*pouts* Still, those that I manage to get my jaws on she let me keep...hee!

Scottie