Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Raw Food Diet, Day 183- Too Much Fun Is Not Enough

Our mornings generally go like this:

Mom leaves the human crate bright and early in the morning.  She does whatever she does for a few minutes until Pupi and I are released from our crates.  Before we know it, we're outside to empty "the tanks" and work out our beastly muscles.  Then it's back to the apartment for our biggest feast of the day, which always tastes melt-in-your-mouth-meaty after working up a good appetite.  Pupi washes down breakfeast with some serious thrashing of the SingingChristmasTreeMouseToy, while I bark, butt-herd him, poke mom, pull socks from the hamper and otherwise look for trouble at a hyper-kinetic pace.  This goes on for about 30 minutes before Pupi and I plop into our snoozel spots and we're out cold for the remainder of the morning.  Mom usually waits until our morning zoomies are through before she leaves us to shower, but yesterday she disappeared into the Room of Bathing before we had fully exhausted ourselves.  Well, I found myself some trouble, and there was no one there to stop me.  
The paper shreds started on my side and continued through 2 other rooms.

The only issue I ran into was that my need for sleepies kicked in strongly and suddenly, and as usual I passed out where I stood.  Unfortunately, at that moment I happened to be standing amongst my mess, surrounded by evidence of my toy tossing and paper shredding.  She knew I was guilty!

I couldn't be bothered to make my tired beastly muscles move, or get my furry rear as far away from the wreckage as possible.  So I did what I always know gets me in mom's good graces... I made her laugh.  It's a great trick:  When she comes around acting all mad-like, don't move from your sleepie spot.  Keep your body perfectly still and pretend to be sound asleep, and when she comes real close... so close... swiftly lift your knee and expose your groin.  Hold it up there proudly, but pretend to still be snoozeling.  Seriously guys.  This one works.
Stanislaw, knee in the air, groin exposed

Humans are a simple creature,


Ella Bean said...


You crack me up! Handsome, beastly and a sense of humor...You are a Bean's dream come true.

I'll be dreaming of you during my daily snoozles...


Ella Bean

Charlie Daniels said...

You were just practising for the Ball & Mess events for the Pawlimpics weren't you?



Petra said...

You are so smart, Stanislaw! I'm going to practice that trick right now.

Maggie and Mitch said...

Great tip, Stan! We'll be practicing this one for sure!

Love ya lots,
Maggie and Mitch

Mack said...

Thanks for the advice!! I will have to use it cause I love to shred newspapers and it makes mom very cross.

I am a ball of energy like you Stani..
***sigh*** We have so much in common,


Fenway said...


So much has happened and Ms. Alpha had to slave away in a downtown office to make some quick Banquet Cash. She couldn't play on Dog Blogs and didn't even get to see your EXCELLENT Birthday Blockbuster until just now. She LOVES it and is a serious Venga Boys Girl. Perfect music for your thrashiness.

Thank for the delish dried jerky recipe. I will have her prepare a batch for me promptly. Liver is oh so nice, but I need great quantities to be Have while I'm training.

Your shreddies was fun to see. My predecessor was a world class Destroyer of Paper...yet inexplicably, he would bring the Alphas their mail piece-by-piece when it dropped thru the slot.

The Pretend Sleep was a good Tip for the Day. Cocking the rear leg skyward seems to diffuse any bad feelings and I shall employ this method to evade all discipline!

Scottie the 'cutie' said...

Stan, you are too adorable and a beastly manner of course! Mom can't help laughing when she read this...=) I will have to learn what you did,coz usually I would just stand there looking innocent when I did something Nottie...That didn't work. =\


FleasGang said...

Ahh, the Captain Morgan pose. Shelly has this one down pat. But she throws in a rapid fire tail wag with it!

The Fleas