Friday, May 9, 2008

Raw Food Diet, Day 102- I Would Win if I Were on Reality TV

I'm thinking about trying out for a reality TV show in order to make some money to put towards the purchase of cheese.  I've watched these wimps on these shows and I'm pretty confident that I would dominate.  Take the so-called "gross food" eating episode every reality show has.  There are guys choking down insects and organs, puking and gagging and taking an hour to do it.  If someone put a plate of bugs in front of me, I would eat it in about 2 seconds and then eat everyone else's plates too.  I'd get immunity every episode, which wouldn't matter anyway because - who would vote me out if I were up for elimination?  Everybody loves me!


So I applied to Survivor but since I am only 18 months old they wouldn't let me on.  That lugoed - I think they were afraid that I would just completely dominate, eat all the animals on the island and steal Jeff Probst's lunch.  But it's always been a dream of mine to be on this particular show.  You don't have to bathe, brush your teeth, get groomed and the food is usually raw and delicious.  You can go potty anywhere and any time because you live outside in good-boy potty zone, everyone is super stinky, days are spent either napping or hunting for food, and I'd be surrounded by a bunch of really bored humans that are just looking for something to do... like rub my belly?  Oh man.  It would be awesome.

Look out reality TV, this beast is coming at 'ya.

Stanislaw

My brother and me practicing our eating of gross things:
Okay, so maybe it was just zucchini spears, but I did eat a crunchy fly yesterday...

8 comments:

Mack said...

You know that is a great idea Stanislaw!

Your brother is very handsome.

Are you two from the same litter??

Cheers,
Mack T. Beans

Momo & Pinot said...

Stainslaw!! You're right!! Survivor sounds pawfect show for us, doggies! :)

Did u really eat a crunchy fly? or did you swallow it by accident?!? :D

Have a great weekend!
Momo & Pinot

Mack said...

Stani:
Paris Rain here. Were you adopted from the Cocker Spaniel Rescue of East Texas - Houston?? Cause that's where I was adopted from!!!!
This is so exciting!
Love ya,
PR

Niamh said...

I never thought about going on Survivor, but you are right, you'd be terrific on it. Dogs could certainly dominate all those running and swimming challenges.

Maybe we could get a Dogs with Blogs tribe together and win a million dollars. Think of all the toys and treats we could buy with that!

Your friend,
Niamh

Mack said...

Hi Stani-
It's me again love. I was adopted from the Houston CS Rescue September 21, 2007. This is so exciting!

My mom went to Cocker rescue day at PetSmart in Pearland and of course she immediately fell in love. And the rest as they say... is history!

You live in Chicago don't you? I must confess I've been reading your bloggy all day! When did you guys move!??

Love,
Paris

Mack said...

Hi precious,
I was born 11/1/06. I had two previous owners who were too old to appreciate my exuberant (ie:hyper) personality. My bubba Mack & I have about the same energy level, so I finally found the right home!
I don't think we are related. There are mostly blonds in my family tree. No one on my side has that sexy black hair like you! ***swoon****

Kisses,
Paris

Mack said...

Hi handsome Stani!
Paris here!!!!!!
An evil cat scratched my eye! Oh the horror! I was just a wee lil pup when it happened and my eye stopped growing! It's ok now, but sometimes I have trouble seeing out of it.
My mom had a half cocker/half bluetick hound (My uncle Sumi) before I was born that had a cherry eye. He had the surgery and was good as new!

Kisses,
PR

Fenway said...

Wow, Stan. You are wicked brilliant to come up with the Survivor contestant concept.

I thought Border Collies were the smartest breed. Either you are part BC, or the experts have that complete wrong.